reflections under pressure
And here we are dealing with a new quadrature.
In recent times, those in which I wrote in this blog, some things have changed, others are simply left property, indeterminate, so firm as to be frightening.
But today I'm afraid of something else. I fear I will be assessed as of what I can give and what I expect. My future scares me. When I was 15 in my room listening to the clash, the verve, Oasis, blur and I was looking forward to the future came to escape, and become a rock star to duet with Liam Gallagher. Today that future is here, I'm not a rock star and I (and I doubt that will ever happen) duet with Liam Gallagher.
If the guide becomes a good 25 years, I have concluded a cock, or at least nothing that I really wanted to do: I have not become a rockstar, I got a fucking of enemies because I have always been consistent and sincere, not I have a lot of money and not even the maid at home, but I graduated and I live in Rome, I have a family that is crazy about me and I to their health and I also (but not sing victory that you never know in sti moonlight).
Tomorrow is one of many important day ... I, and I say publicly, is a repressed and depressed, with anxiety and panic attacks if I have to do something I do not sleep at night, I always mentally predispormi what I will do in the week to allay my anxieties, I do not know if it is a problem, I do not know if it happens to you, but for now I can check my neuroses. I hope to do it for a while ', in other words until I have earned enough to pay for a specialist.
Sometimes I feel suffocated. I wanted to escape my country, but I miss it, because there I probably have an identity. This summer they told me that thanks to me now my last name + last name is not trivial. I would have preferred to remain anonymous, or maybe not, maybe bo.
I would really like to know what people think of me. HONESTLY. Not licking ass, not hypocrisy, honestly. Facebook claims that my mortal sin is pride. Maybe not wrong. My mother always said when I was a teenager I was proud. My
rose a few days ago. But I miss. Terribly. I believe that every moment that separates us is a moment lost, that is not coming back and I feel overwhelmed by this anxiety when one day, I hope the + remote as possible, these moments can not really come back I know that my heart will become black lead. I can not even begin to imagine my life without my loved ones. The other day while returning from work and I was going to take the elevator I realized that mine is a desperate faith, a faith that if there were, I'd be dead inside. I have to clear my head.
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